My wife and I recently had a major argument which ended up with me being kicked out of our home.

I accused my wife of cheating, because she’d been very secretive with her phone. The number of messages she sent had increased, she always kept it by her side and she started muting notifications. She said she was just chatting to friends, but I didn’t deal with this very well and we ended up having a massive row.

A few years ago, a similar thing happened and we lived apart for a short time. Again, I let my emotions get out of control and misjudged everything. There have also been times in the past where I’ve put work before my family and haven’t been there for them when they needed me. This has led to self doubt in my abilities as a father and husband and now I’m paying for all of this. My wife won’t talk to me at the moment and nor will the kids.

She won’t take me back now as I’ve reneged on previous promises and continued to let them down. I’m completely at a loss. I despise myself for hurting the woman I love and ruining my family life. What can I do?