To achieve what they want, many teenagers use the manipulation method in dialogue with their parents. The child uses the subtle soul strings of his parents, which he presses and receives that which you just can’t get. It is very important to understand in time that you are being manipulated and not give in to emotional impact.
Many children are well versed in the psychology of their parents and know how to get them most of all. With the help of manipulations, the child seeks to cause the following feelings in the parents. More baby related articles.
– Feeling of shame.
The child “shakes” strong parental positions to cause shame. Usually the children say: “Sergei’s parents buy him everything he asks for, but you won’t interrogate anything”; “Natasha tells everything to her parents, because they understand her and never scold her, and you scream about every occasion”; “Dima is allowed to walk until night, and I live like a prisoner …”; “Lena’s parents always invite children, and you’re always dissatisfied,” etc.
The child makes you understand that someone’s parents are better than you, and you are poorly performing parental duties. With the help of such statements, a feeling of shame is evoked in you, and this is the main method of manipulation.
– Feeling of fear.
A message is created where a threat to the life of a teenager sounds if you do not accept his terms. “I will run away from you and you will never see me again”; “If you do not give me money, then I will begin to steal it”; “If you do not let me go outside, then I will jump out of the window.”
The child causes anxiety and fear in the parents with the help of which he can manipulate. In such a situation, parents are ready to accept any conditions, if only the child does not expose his life to dangers and risks.
Statements may be made from children to evoke strong feelings of guilt. For example, in a family with a poor financial situation, a child may say: “Each of my classmates has the latest smartphone model, and everyone pins me because of the old phone”; “Everyone has parents, like parents, only me …”
Such statements may consist of different claims, but the essence is the same – the child is not happy with his life, lack of sufficient attention from his parents, poor school, etc.
By causing parents a sense of guilt, a teenager can achieve a lot from their parents, even against their will.
– Manifestation of anger.
Anger, anger and irritation – these are the feelings that you want to quickly get rid of. Usually the child calls them with his long “whining”, which does not stop, despite any persuasion of the parents. He insists and “buzzes” in order to achieve his goal.
And many parents succumb to this manipulation in order to stop “whining” and not go to a heated quarrel.
From the above feelings, parents become impotent when they are not sure of their actions. And helpless parents, unable to resist the persistent teenager who has learned to manipulate their feelings.
To counter teenage manipulations, parents need to monitor the manifestation of their feelings. Listening to offensive expressions and comparisons, you do not need to take them literally, because they serve as a tool to get what the teenager wants.
Remember that you are being manipulated. If you decide to make concessions on some issues, then they must be thoughtful and adequate so as not to harm the teenager and yourself.